Ouch. I don't remember giving informed consent to becoming this old. Alternative is worse, though.
In case anyone else is ancient, Medicare starts at the beginning of the month in which you turn 65. Not knowing that almost made me procrastinate too long. Forcing factor for us is that our private insurance will terminate if we don't do all the Medicare stuff on a timely basis and make Medicare our primary payer; found that out in a nice letter from Blue Cross which, unfortunately, spent a lot of time getting forwarded.
So how do you sign up for Medicare?
You CAN'T do it online unless you also want to retire and signup for Social Security benefits which I don't (strange that you can do both but not just Medicare alone but very clear on the Medicare and Social Security websites). You can go to a Social Security office. Better, you CAN sign up by phone although the process leaves something to be desired.
You call Social Security, not Medicare. You listen to a long spiel on how the economic stimulus checks are being sent out – no apparent way to escape. Then you're asked if you want Spanish or English; perhaps Spanish-speakers don't care about economic stimulus checks; more likely someone programmed the AVR wrong. Voice prompt asks you what you want; "Medicare enrollment" doesn't help; ditto "enroll in Medicare"; "I want to enroll in Medicare" gets you to "I can help you with Medicare".
Another long and uninterruptible monologue – this one on many aspects of Medicare. Only when it's done can you say again "I want to enroll in Medicare". "I'm going to transfer you to someone who can help with your Medicare enrollment" says the female-emulating bot.
"All of our staff are busy helping other callers. Our automatic equipment can handle many callers at once. Many issues can be addressed on our website. We get most calls early in the month and early in the week (yesterday was both). Please call back at a less busy time. Goodbye."
"Yuk!" (that's not really what I said).
So I called back at seven this morning. Learned again about economic stimulus checks. Failed again to make an untimely breakout from the monologues. Finally forwarded to "someone who can help you".
A new bot, also female-emulating, says she is asking me some verification questions that an agent would ask. She has a hard time understanding my oral spelling of "Tom" but picks up "Evslin" right away and does a pretty good job of pronouncing it. OK on my mother's maiden name, too. She says she'll give me to a person.
I hear someone talking – then silence! Oh, no. I wait before slamming down the phone. Wait longer. A person comes on! She tells me I can do this on the web site; I tell her no. She then agrees. She tells me I will be rejected for SSI even though I'm not applying for it. I don't argue. She then transfers me to the real signup agent.
He tells me that the verbal (sic) signup is equivalent to signing a form and is under penalties of perjury. I agree that I understand. Lots of reasonably relevant questions. Then he asks me everything the bot asked. Since I get the answers right, I AM eligible for phone signup. I affirm –again – that I know the answers are under penalty of perjury and that, when I get the forms, I'll tell them about any errors. Stuff is gonna be mailed tomorrow. This conversation took about ten minutes – not unreasonable assuming the stuff really comes in time for me to get it to Blue Cross to keep the rest of my coverage.
Probably more that you want to know. And doesn't even address whether I should be in this government program or should have been forced to pay for it while I was working – even though I do think there should be a medical safety net for old people.